It has come to my attention that I am in no way a perv. I have lived under the false assumption for years now that I was. It has been a somewhat painful and totally embarrassing, public realization, but after hanging with you all, it is obvious I can no longer continue in my delusional state.
My earlier post was meant to showcase my stellar fighting skills and was not my attempt to share with the world foreplay with my husband. The first version on the post included a statement about how, had Arete been present, he would have been proud of me. Sure, take a moment to visualize that threesome. Apparently, God had mercy on me and must have quietly nudged me to remove it.
I read that post so many times and I got nothing risque from it. My only attempt at any sexual innuendo was the "I am extremely fond of his groin area". I was so blind to the nature of my writing I let me 13 year old read it and thankfully, public school has not corrupted her mind completely because all I got was "Eww, gross." "Who says groin?"
I feel confident that I am in the right environment to cure my problem of clean thinking and I'm hopeful that my conversion will be a quick one because I am getting tired of accidentally sticking my clean thoughts into your filthy minds.
Feel free to email me "educational" material that you think might be helpful. Pictures are appreciated.
**My husband's says he would appreciate it more if no actual pictures were sent:)
Nah, you wouldn't be YOU if you changed! Just let the rest of the pervs think what they want. (I DO have to admit, that post made me giggle a little bit too, so I will include myself in the perv list)
ReplyDeleteI think it is to late for me:). Just being silly on a Friday. Thanks!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeletebahahahahah! i just can't stop laughing!!! too funny, me dear girl!
ReplyDeleteyour friend,
kymber
LOL I'm not even touching this!
ReplyDeleteThis way leads to madness!
"Weer'd Beard" was a name given to me by others, not placed upon myself.
But there's always this
http://snarkybytes.com/ViciousCircle/?p=17
I warned you! :)
Always got my back. Thanks! I actually found that interesting, especially the points on piracy of videos. I am proud to say I think I got most of those jokes.
DeleteEven though I don't actually watch porn, really, I do have to agree that smell-a-vision would not be a good technological advance for that particular industry.
Hmmm...I think some people are just more naturally "gifted" (pervy pun fully intended) with a higher sex-drive and less severely restricting moral upbringing (or we've managed to shed quite a bit of that moral upbringing along the way), which then allows us to automatically *tweak* conversations (overheard/red) or images to see the dirty side. Its like sitting in a locker room, except the room is full of the voices in your head. Some got it, some don't....but, as Gracie said, that's what makes us all different and unique, and just be yourself! Cuz once you go down that path....to quote Weerd...madness! (butt its a fun madness, all the voices in your head know you and accept you for who you were!)
ReplyDeleteReally, its more about allowing yourself to see the potty-humor in things. Quick comebacks (cumbacks?) and instantly twisting things just takes practice.
Ah, heck with all that philosophical stuff. C'mon over to the Dirty Side! (we got nookie....er....cootie.....er....cookies!)
I would like to make a distinction between the understanding of pervy things and "high" sex drive.
DeleteGood Lord, you don't know what you're asking for with this crowd.
ReplyDeleteI would suggest not clicking on anything with the world "jar" in the title.
I have no idea what that means, but I will definitely heed your advice.
DeleteI have GOT to stop reading your posts at school! I have too many kids asking "Why is Mrs. Tea making snorting noises for?" I might get in trouble! :-D
ReplyDeleteLol. Glad I made you laugh!
DeleteProbably just most of us being sarcastic. I knew what you meant from your previous post.
ReplyDeleteYeah, most of you:) And I am mostly just being silly.
DeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteYou made me laugh.... Thanks!
ReplyDeleteOK, here you go.
ReplyDeletehttp://bit.ly/Iy7a2A
Plus there's this, which is some hairy pu$$^ with guns
http://bit.ly/JfWqFO
There's something pervy there, I'm sure.
As kymber would say bawhahahahahahahahah! Funny !
DeleteIt's obvious to me that I've gotten old and soft, 'cuz I don't see a thing to get sexcited about in that, or other posts.
ReplyDeleteWait- you were talking about Glocks and S&Ws one time, and then...
...and no comments about bein' soft 'cuz my Honey thinks I'm hard! ;)
Hahahahahahhahahaha
DeleteSimple your blog, your rules. Just like Matt over at Long Tree Short Rope.
ReplyDeleteThanks Rob. I was in a big time happy, goofy mood yesterday and I was just joking, but I really do appreciate the encouragement!!
DeleteI follow your blog, but I don't think I have ever commented. I just never thought I had anything of value to add. I don't see how any normal human could get anything pervy out of your post. I thought it was sweet and very funny -- I did actually LOL. Don't let them get to you, you are OK, they are not.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the comment John. You are nice to have my back. They are just messing with me. No harm:)
DeleteOh my, Agirl. Getting an education on the internet? Lol. My moral compass always seems to point south or maybe it's just broken.
ReplyDeleteOk, if that is innuendo I got it and if not you just like me:)
DeleteI vote broken but all the best people are somewhat broken or twisted in some way.
ReplyDeleteThis is YOUR blog. Post what you want, absorb what you like, and disregard the rest. There will always be "the 10 percent."
ReplyDeleteSteve
Steve, thank you!! I was serious that I am not as pervy as previously thought, but I was just being silly and they were being silly back. Thanks for standing up for me though:)
DeleteIt's OK, AGirl, I had a friend in college who was equally innocent. She was dating my girlfriend's (now wife) best friend and we were out at a burger joint one night enjoying some shakes.
ReplyDeleteShe innocently asked "Who want's my cherry?"
I lost it.
Hehehehehe. Glad I'm not alone.
DeleteLOL, just bat your eyes a lot... :-)
ReplyDeleteGood plan!!
DeleteIf anyone seriously had a problem with what you wrote, which I took as harmless fun, they shouldn't be reading blogs, anyway!
ReplyDeleteKeep on keepin' on!
Love ya Guffaw
DeleteI wouldn't worry too much... except that some mall-ninja somewhere has now started a training course in tactical tickling... it's a one day - or night - course for only $295.00...
ReplyDeleteDann in Ohio
That is hilarious!!!
Deletei just read the previous post. very hot.
ReplyDeletei need a cigar now.