I have an awful lot of new readers, so for the those who might not know, I will give a brief recap of my story, although honestly if you want to know me, it is worth going back and reading my old posts.
Anyway, 7 months ago I stood in a parking lot with my 7 year old daughter and was approached by a guy who was asking for money and who would not stop coming at me when I asked him to. He came at me quite aggressively, but by the grace of God, 2 cars pulled into the parking lot, he grabbed the money I tossed at him and he ran away. I was left shaken and with the realization that I had zero skills and no way to keep myself or my daughter safe. I stood there completely helpless and I decided that I would not be in that position again.
Before that I day I was very anti-gun. I didn't want them in my house and I was very afraid of them.
After that I day, I went through quite a transformation. I went from fear to freedom in a relatively short amount of time.
I started this blog as a journal to my daughter, who being raised by me, believed guns were bad and scary, so now that I was carrying one, well, it rocked her world.
I wanted her to see the struggle I went through and how I came to carry a gun. I didn't want her to think it was casual or that she couldn't trust me or my opinions. I was very nervous that she would doubt everything I said because I had changed my mind on an issue I felt so strongly about.
I had no idea when I started this journey that I would change so much. That I would actually enjoy shooting or that it would become a passion of mine and I had no idea how my daughter would feel about me or guns.
Over the past 7 months, she has read my blog and we have had countless conversations about guns, but we have had more conversations about self worth, fear, safety, courage, and responsibility.
We both have gone through a lot as we have dealt with what happened in that parking lot. Each of us has let the other deal with it how they needed to and we did it with love and honesty.
I let her hate guns and she lets me love them.
Slowly as she watched me go from a quiet woman who needed to be protected and who was afraid of what was lurking around the corner to someone confident and strong and who was cautious, but not scared, she began to change. As, I grew, so did she.
She started to have conversations with people where she was the one defending the rights of gun owners. Even though she would never shoot one herself, she was adament about defending the rights of other's to do so.
Then she started to become much more aware of her environment and sometimes when we would leave a store, she would say something like "Mom, did you notice that guy was in every aisle we were in and then he followed us out of the store?" And one time in the car we went down a wrong street and she said "You have your gun right, mom?"
Her mind was beginning to change. Her mind was becoming a weapon. She was learning to take responsiblity for her life.
Then it happened...
Whenever I go to the range I ask her if she would like to go and she always says "No thank you, but have fun."
So, this morning, she was on the bus heading to school and she sent me a text that said Looooooooove yoooooou!"
I sent one back that said the same thing and then just cuz I said "Hey, dad and I are going to the range. Do you want to come?"
and
she
said
"Sure."
I tried not to act surprised or overly excited, but it took some effort.
"Sure, you want to go?"
"Yea." She said.
"Do you want to shoot my gun."
"Yeah, I will try."
This child, this amazing young woman, said "Sure, I will try."
I am so gosh darn excited!!
I am excited because I get to share something that I love with someone that I love, but I am even more excited that my daughter is facing her fears and taking a step forward in becoming more prepared.
I honestly wasn't sure this day would ever come, so wish me luck, say a prayer, and keep your fingers crossed that this is a positive experience for her and that someday she decides she isn't afraid to be...
Mean. I Mean Plum Mad Dog Mean!
Is the clock just ticking slowly? I remember Texas Girl's first day at the range vivdly. It was so much fun! I will be anxiously waiting to hear how she does.
ReplyDeleteIf she turns out to be anything like my daughter, she'll need a job to pay for ammo!
ReplyDeleteHope she loves every minute of it!